Jessica Simpson took the growing SHHH! baby in her uterus for a walk in NYC today and I guess we're going to keep doing this until she's sitting in front of TLC's cameras saying that she had no idea babies grow inside human bodies, because she learned in her favorite baby picture book by Ann Geddes that newborns grow in terracotta pots and you buy them at a flower nursery. But while Jessica lets her papoose pouch speak for itself, her ex-boyfriend Tony Romo did shit the old fashioned way by actually announcing his wife's pregnancy with words. UsWeekly says that at an anti-drug rally at some high school in Texas today, Tony told the kids that his peen shot the mighty sperm that busted a fetus in the gut of Chace Crawford's sister. Yes, Tony put it just like that.
"I actually have one on the way. My wife is pregnant."
And with that, you better stock up on bottled water and board up all your windows like it's the sequel to Hurricane Irene. Because any minute now a white blond lightning bolt of visible farts and tragic desperation will shoot through the streets screeching, "AH'S WAS IN THE FAMILY WAY FIRST! AH'S WAS IN THE FAMILY WAY FIRST!"
Look from length. If you demand accept totes, accept one which hits in a adulatory put on your absolute body, because purses add aggregate for your frame.cheap designer handbags In case your achievement tend to be large, your purse should appointment your waistline to draw the absorption upward. For those who accept a abundant waist,replica mulberry cheap purses accept a backpack accepting best straps.
Is Jessica still a b*stard Republican 1%er who cares nothing about the other 99%. She needs a kick in the head. OWS Rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Whatever on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 9:54pm.
Romo needs to go! Stat! He is worthless...
Submitted by Rocket on Wed, 10/26/2011 - 8:30am.
Yeah, he's the quarterback for Dallas, but I've always thought he was fug
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and a asswipe dickhead to boot!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I guess it's best to end a relationship the same way you start it: absolutely fucking tanked. MK 6/11
why must she look like a 7 cent hooker while pregnant. That top is so tight the baby squeezed down into her ass. There are so many better options for preg clothing. Oh yeah and the hair/weave looks like straw.
Yeah, he's the quarterback for Dallas, but I've always thought he was fug.
Submitted by VenusVibeTrap on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 6:24pm.
for some reason, this girl does not bug me like most celebrity chicks do. I think it's awesome that she's ignoring the press and not making an announcement. They've all treated her horribly over the years, why give any of them a leg up on the information? I also think the "airhead" routine was just that... a routine
==================================================
I feel the same way. For whatever reason, the black hole where my heart should be warms up for Jess, and I end up rooting for her. I think it's because she seems very normal and down-to-Earth.
-----------------------------------------------
"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom
since we all know jessica is pregnant why would anyone pay for that information? i feel very sorry for this baby having the simpsons as family.
Submitted by Detective_LaToya on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 11:07pm.
I simply can't understand why anyone cares about this. Boring irrelevant famewhore needs to be thrown on the scrap pile with Paris, Kuntdashians etc.
==========
No, Dect. LaToya, we need you to get to the bottom of this.
For someone who appeared to not want anything to do with Jess after the breakup, Romo sure likes to steal the attention away like some bitter bitch.
---------------------------------------
What would Jesus do for a Klondike Bar?
Submitted by Bjork You on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 8:17pm.
From 2008: "Jessica Simpson Mulls Religious Studies":
http://www.christianpost.com/news/jessica-simpson-mulls-religious-studie...
_______________
Not that Jessica Simpson could define the word "mull" or even give a close approximation after hearing it used in a sentence.
I simply can't understand why anyone cares about this. Boring irrelevant famewhore needs to be thrown on the scrap pile with Paris, Kuntdashians etc.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You are fucking bitches, this is my prom!"
Submitted by Dallas on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 6:54pm.
Lmao at these comments! Something is telling me that Jessica is the one that will end up smelling like a rose in this one. Romo is a joke in Dallas, and probably won't be playing for the Cowboy's next season (God willing)!! Simpson is worth much more that Tony ever will.
Jerry Jones needs to cut Romo loose. Instead of working his butt off when they made it to the play-offs he was farting around in Mexico with Jessica and her famewhore family. His stupid ass gets more headlines for being a golfer then a footballer player. DUMB FUCK!
Hopefully if Tony romo's son is a boy it will not grow up to be one the most overrated quarterbacks in football history like it's very overrated daddy. Jessica would put a pile of cat turds in her tummy if she thought she could get more attention.
Yeah, his wife is knocked up. But it ain't Chestica.
Kind of a co-inky-dink, int it?
It'll be interesting to see if Jess actually marries this Johnson person.
.
.
She's not 'Wife'.
They postponed the wedding.
*confused*
The only reason she hasn't opened her yap yet is because she's looking for the right payday. It's got nothing to do with tact, nothing to do with wanting to keep this private, and certainly nothing to do with her *ahem* Christian upbringing.
As soon as some publisher comes around with the right dollar figure and promise of an x number of pages spread in their weekly rag, she'll be blabbing her head off about every last detail and then some.
Ewww, yuck and blech. But that's just my opinion...
seriously, who gives a flying fuck who's sperminated? I didn't realize it was such a rare occurrence and that Hollywood twats merit bowing down to for that reason alone (hell, for any reason!). shit, I barely care if it happens to family members, much less total strangers with too much money.
seriously, who gives a flying fuck who's sperminated? I didn't realize it was such a rare occurrence and that Hollywood twats merit bowing down to for that reason alone (hell, for any reason!). shit, I barely care if it happens to family members, much less total strangers with too much money.
now why the hell did this post twice????
is there anything in this universe less interesting than a bloated, dimwitted skank with a creepy father?
I hate the Cowgirls and Tony Romo. Please dear God let this year be the Redskins' year.
(lmfao. I crack myself up.)
_______________________________________________
I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
Well Tony Romo finally made a cumback in the 4th quarter.
Did Jessica steal Marilyn Manson's boots from the 90s??
Submitted by LaChaylo on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 5:52pm.
And Tony Romodontknowhowtowinfootballgames
==========
Ha, ha!!!
I think that Simpson is staying mum about her pregnancy not because she is private and tactful but because she isn't married. I could give a shit, I hate those terms like "bastard" and "illegitmate child" and other such judgmental and cruel terms. But then again, I haven't built a career on being such a good Christian girl and all.
From 2008: "Jessica Simpson Mulls Religious Studies":
http://www.christianpost.com/news/jessica-simpson-mulls-religious-studie...
I hope the baby doesn't inherit his shit-eating grin. It'll probably come out of the womb with a baseball hat on backwards.
See? Not everyone has to make pregnancy a fucking payday. And I can't stand Doofus Romo.
***********************************************
Make it like a memory
Take away the sound and the sight
There will never be another love
With the power of , you and I
-Barbra Streisand
Girlfriend needs a bra that fits.
Makes my chest hurt looking at that.
*______________________________________*
"I bet Michael Lohan's sperm comes out of his peen yelling screaming and pissed off at the world, all the sperms are getting into fights with each other about who gets to swim where and shit." -- Whamo
Well give Candace credit.
She was Romo's jump-off and manage to run Jessica off.
Then marry him.
And within 6 months got pregnant.
I am officially nominating Candace to the Jump-off/Gold Diggers Hall of Fame. Girl has her game on point.
Yet, I have always thought Jessica really dodged a bullet with Romo. And should send Candace a big fat "Thank You!".
Submitted by lovelylaney on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 6:27pm.
@applehead - right? she looks bigger. if anyone recalls her birthday birkin bag picture, she was wearing hella huge clothes in that picture. maybe she's farther along than is predicted. xmas/new year's baby perhaps?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I agree, although they were pretty late in the game to try and get the "exclusive Money" for the interview that she's knocked up...they should have started a couple three months ago, not when she's about to drop this kid
Jesus Christ, its like high school all over again with Jess and Tony. Didn't Zack Morris and Kelly Kapowski act like this all through "Saved By the Bell"(minus the pregnancy competition)?
EDIT- I think she is wearing a Bella Band. I have one in black. It can be worn like a belt just down at the waist of your pants or pulled all the way up to your ribs.
Lmao at these comments! Something is telling me that Jessica is the one that will end up smelling like a rose in this one. Romo is a joke in Dallas, and probably won't be playing for the Cowboy's next season (God willing)!! Simpson is worth much more that Tony ever will be...
In the end, who cares?
She had better be pregnant or else she is going to have an awful lot of trouble with that belly and belly button!
She should at the very least stop wearing skintight, see-through clothes. NOT flattering!
The ONLY way this'll get interesting is if Papa Joe is the father.
"...a white blond lightning bolt of visible farts and tragic desperation will shoot through the streets screeching, "AH'S WAS IN THE FAMILY WAY FIRST!"
LMFATHOOOO MK!
_____
Bugs Bunny 'What's Opera, Doc?"- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2VMqQ6XnmI (Beginning portion)
Dre,Eminem, Skylar- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA770wpLX-Q&ob=av3e
This slob air-humps. If that is par for the course of a thinking woman, then slay me where I stand.
But, Venus, I agree on her maybe giving the press the bird and staying silent like nothing is going on in her entire mid-section area. So long as she stays away from the Twinkies she might be able to pull this baby thing off. Or something.
_____
Bugs Bunny 'What's Opera, Doc?"- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2VMqQ6XnmI (Beginning portion)
Dre,Eminem, Skylar- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA770wpLX-Q&ob=av3e
papa joe outta date dina lohan
hell yea!
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
@applehead - right? she looks bigger. if anyone recalls her birthday birkin bag picture, she was wearing hella huge clothes in that picture. maybe she's farther along than is predicted. xmas/new year's baby perhaps?
"Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Tue, 10/25/2011 - 6:17pm.
What is a "Tony Romo" and can I hit it like a piñata ?"
------------------------------------------------
Yes. Sign up to be an offensive tackle on any team and you will get to hit that.
------------------------------------------------
"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
for some reason, this girl does not bug me like most celebrity chicks do. I think it's awesome that she's ignoring the press and not making an announcement. They've all treated her horribly over the years, why give any of them a leg up on the information? I also think the "airhead" routine was just that... a routine.
SHe looks pretty far along...farther the Beyonce
What is a "Tony Romo" and can I hit it like a piñata ?
She looks cute. Haven't seen her man around much lately...
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*
Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
hahaha I also thought Tony Romo was referring to Jessica. I guess I'm not keeping track of her man du jour. Oh well, all of Hollywood is someone's ex and all of Hollywood is pregnant these days.
Thanks, MissJane. I guess I just wasn't reading clearly and skimming. Now it makes sense.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
And Tony Romodontknowhowtowinfootballgames and his famewhorey wife are having a kid?
Good lord. She's going to make this a 9 month long segment on the CW 33 news. I can feel it.
Tony Romo is married to someone else and she is knocked up. Jess here is knocked up by a former NFL player and they are engaged. Tony is not talking about Jess.
**************************************************************
You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
Why is she barefoot and partially nude in a store bathroom stall? Did you guys see this?
http://blog.music.aol.com/2011/10/25/jessica-simpson-new-york-toilet-pho...
_________________________________________________
"When I come up, I rush, I rush for you..."
Sadly, maternity Spanx do exist. And I don't think she's faking it -- my belly button never popped out during pregnancy (thank god). Congrats to Jessica! I just feel bad for her breasts -- they're going to be ENORMOUS. Ouch!
When did they get married? I thought they were still engaged.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Mimi is the ONLY one who can do plump pregnancy and look like a freshly plucked daisy in her maternity Juicy Couture sweats.
Don't you even try, you trashy ass frog.
Is there really pregnancy spanx? That's what this looks like.