Too Easy: Kristen Stewart Is Too Sad To Shower
As Robert Pattinson leaves sparkly tear stains on Reese Witherspoon's country couch (read that as "Reese Witherspoon's country cooch" if you need a more interesting visual today), the Health Department is knocking on Giovanni Agnelli's door after getting complaints from the neighbors about the rank scent of curdled armpit cream and dirty butt sweat coming from his place. It wasn't from a bunch of squattin' hobos having an orgy. It was from Kristen Stewart wallowing in her stank misery, because RPattz won't call her baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.
Some source tells Radar that KStew is in the Sunset Plaza area, hiding out in the house of her producer friend Giovanni Agnelli (not to be confused with Lapo Elkann's grandpa). The source says that KStew has gone against nature and achieved the impossible by actually feeling real emotion. KStew is bawling, eating ice cream, bawling, eating ice cream and bawling some more, and she's doing all of it far, far away from a shower.
"She is beyond mortified and humiliated and she is also broken hearted. She says she truly loved Rob. She says he was her soul mate, but she blew it and now she is scared that she has lost him forever. She is pretty much inconsolable.
Kristen hasn't showered or changed or washed her hair in several days. She is laying around in her T-shirt and shorts and eating ice cream. She really wants to believe that she can win back Rob, but I think deep down she knows that isn't the case."
If who ever is in charge of KStew's publicity shit leaked this, then they should've at least made it believable. KStew can't cry and if she could cry out natural tears, she would only cry if her weed box was empty. Also, they should've said that KStew is so sad and confused that she accidentally wandered into a place she never goes, the shower, and did something she hardly ever does, clean her body with a sponge. Bitch's heartbroken misery drove her to shower! Now, that would've been a story.
Also, KStew's people should've just released this as her official statement on the whole thing:
As we all know, these days a perfection brand Prada Americas Cup Sneakers are loved by more and more celebrities and famous stars.New Prada Men Shoes can easily match with any style clothes and allow you to show more elegant personality.Prada discount shoes for sale will make your life more wonderful.Allow these stunning shoes belong to yourself.
If you also want to shop Prada footwear for sale, please choose our authority online shop.The Pradas shoes will help every wearer to show extraordinary and stylish temperament. It is very necessary for fashion gentleman to own one pair Prada Guys Footwear which can match with leisure suits.
Feature of Men Prada Leather Shoes Lace Up Loafers Navy Blue
The classic Mens Prada Leather Shoes will never go out of style. If you also are eager for more fashion trend,you can not miss the new arrivals Pradas footwear for sale.With the low price ,good quality and best service,our online cheap pradas footwear sale will bring you a different fashion lifestyle.Have a try right now.
So long as high heels seem on the planet,all of the women can not resist the temptation of discount christian louboutin us.Using the red sole style, christian louboutin shoes could enhance your fashion index.It is so happy time.Adhere to me to have a look at 1 pair of fashional and luxury christian louboutin suede shoes.
low cost christian louboutin us is taken into account as one from the biggest designer brand name, it's remarkably well known all around the globe. Christian Louboutin Wedges Pumps is very best promoting and popular amongst ladies team at louboutin shoes online shop.
Functions of Black Christian Louboutin Une Plume 140 Sling Patent Leather-based Cork Wedges
Whenever you put on this sort of Christian Louboutin Wedges in the celebration or beach, it'll assist you to entice all interest of men.How sophisticated and stylish for you to wear such luxury substantial heels.Now ,catch more pretty authentic christian louboutin shoes in online sale.Don't let such fantastic dicount christian louboutin footwear slip far from you.
In the event you like high-heeled footwear, you should not skip the new selling Louboutin Footwear On Sale.Injected the elements of fashion and traditional,women sporting Christian Louboutin Shoes will significantly boost the mature appeal! The cheap louboutin shoes are perfect footwear for parties and make you get noticed.
This pair Christian Louboutin Footwear with wedges heels maybe it is not beautiful enough, but it is comfy and cause you to walking regular. What's more, the peep toe exudes charming of woman, fashion Low cost Christian Louboutin Wedges fit for different fashion outfits.
Functions of Christian Louboutin Praia one hundred forty Leather Wedges Brown
There is little doubt that noble and chic Discount Christian Louboutin Wedges is the wise option for you to appreciate happy summer. All people will envy by your look with the incredible Low cost Louboutin Footwear.The original quality and cheapest price on our Louboutin Footwear For sale on-line shop, take motion on it.
I think nearly fashion men adore to wear substantial heels footwear in their happy time. Select this brand name Christian Louboutins can bring out a fresh and charming image.It is truly popular on sale on-line.With one pair of Christian Louboutin Heels ,you'll appreciate the limitless appeal and could effortlessly catch the eyes of guys.
Every fashion woman could not skip the fascinating Discount Christian Louboutin Footwear. The footwear with classical and enchanting appearance are cherished by women throughout the world, from common people to celebs.
Detail of Christian Louboutin Lady Peep 'Towel' Pumps Sky
These chic fashion made Christian Louboutin Peep Toe Pumps are appropriate for party, relationship or office uses.The deluxe substantial heels are so comfy, so sophisticated , so sizzling which you deserve to own 1. Our Cheap Louboutin Shoes on-line shop is really a reputed website, you are able to location your purchase with out hesitate.
*yawn*
Whatevs...
Lesbian!
***************************************
Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
I wonder who will end up having to scrub that nonsense. I can't imagine it would be her.
Che no wanna chower her culo!! Aye cocina!! That producer better get one of his aides to sandblast that crotchety crust.
"Is this source trying to imply that KStew, before having cheated on RPattz, regularly showered or changed or washed her hair? Bullshit. "
------------------------
Exactly. we are not falling for this one. Nice try !
They're really working overtime to try and make people believe this story. The "affair" was all for PR, to bring an end to Rob and K's "relationship".
Any other golden moments of evolution from Kristen since her self-realism? Has she entered a convent and gone the way of higher altruism (of course, as reported by USWeekly or People)?
*fking eyeroll
____
“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He's two. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.” -George Carlin (RIP MCA and C.Hitchens) *caprica six was/is here*
Kristen needs another girl who will understand. She should be calling Taylor right about now.
_____________________
"Oh you little bitch troll from hell!" -- Patsy Stone
This reminds me of the time that Yoko sent John to LA with May Pang. And THEY got back together eventually! So will Robert and Kristin! I just know it!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Um, there is no way this story is true. I mean, yeah, she's not showering, true, but this story is implying that she's suddenly stopped when in fact, she hasn't actually had a shower since 2008. So no real change here.
"In the seventies, there were only three reasons why three people would be in a room together: to have sex, to snort cocaine, or to have sex on a giant pile of cocaine." --- The Cinema Snob
Shouldn't she be Listening to Marylin Manson, while dressed in head to toe Hot Topic while giving herself paper cuts?
I wonder if this vapid twat smiled while the married dude mounted her?
She is a stupid skank.
That video is fucking hilarious
Submitted by GlitterKitty on Sat, 07/23/2011 -
Is playing a cunt on the internet as satisfying as wanking into your mum's nightie? Because something tells me you'd know all about that.
Yeah, her soul mate with someone else's penis in and around her mouth and pussy.
..
.
---------
"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
And all those blind items about this fake ass relationship...? they're really drawing this out way too long. It's just pathetic now.
Let's just pretend this make believe is real, you can't be the wronged party when you're the one who did the wrong dumb ass. Is this her way of winning back fans?
Submitted by C6 on Sat, 08/04/2012 - 11:01pm
i know KStew is such a phony
thinking,thinking *if tthere's no more KROB, there's no more TWILIGHT movies!right?,YES :)!*
`````````^..+`````````
"And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long"- Redneck Woman
Submitted by loopygorilla on Sun, 08/05/2012 - 8:03am.
Submitted by skinny fat on Sun, 08/05/2012 - 7:53am.
PURE poetry, im inlove!!!
*******
AW, how sweetz. U madez mah dey
Submitted by skinny fat on Sun, 08/05/2012 - 7:53am.
PURE poetry, im inlove!!!
This cunt's misery warms my cold black heart. Suffer bitch for being an insufferable no talent pretentious twat. I could give a fuck about Twitlight.
Trampire go back to school. Learn something.
Note to parents of K Stew: You raised a conceited bitch and whore who will fuck her friend's husband. Nice job.
Submitted by dementa on Sun, 08/05/2012 - 3:42am.
BTW, her fangirls still make me want to punch holes in the wall.
------------------
Most of the ones I've seen are still in denial. Oh she didn't REALLY issue that statement. The pictures were someone else! It's sad how deeply in denial some of these folks are.
BTW, her fangirls still make me want to punch holes in the wall. One of them on an imdb article was whining about poor wittle "naive" Kristen, how she felt "trapped" in a "suffocating" relationship, so it totes wasn't her fault she fucked a married guy.
These dipshits will do anything to preserve their image of their precious Bella Swan, reality be damned. Without a bland, boring girl to project their fantasies on, where would they be?
*********
I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Hmm, not showering, munchies, lying around in her shorts and grimy T-shirt… So in other words, she's not acting any differently.
Anyway, even if she were sad (which I don't believe she is) who cares? She fucked up her own life by her own choice. And since she whined about having too good a life and wanting something to fuck it up, she should be happy.
*********
I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Like she's the first pers9n to ever get dumped.
Fuck off whore.
I haven't comment on this fuckery simply because I don't believe any of it....that video was funny watched it like 10 times
******** SAVE A LIFE. ADOPT A PET *********
Kstew would either be 1. a dead lay like kim k in that ray j porn movie.
or 2. she is into kinky vampire S&M sex and water sports.
Hipsters think that they are so cool.. I bet she has never, ever even has had a taste of Stag beer pass her lips. Where I come from the hicks and rednecks drink it. Oh and hardcore diabetics because it doesn't have any sugar in it. Stag......it makes you gag.
She...actually...looks...like...a...fresh-faced pretty, young girl hete!
"This world is a whore."
But is she eating Little Babies Ice Cream?
Oh, man. K. Stew is so tragic! She needs a hero! She needs the kiss from Prince Forever to unlock the spell of a boring life. OH SAVE ME! OHHH MMMEEEE!!!!
She's looking directly into a camera and she didn't react. Gee I wonder why. She's not even a good actress in her own PR stunt.
I love how they're trying to get their PR money's worth by throwing Reese Witherspoon into this fake as fuck drama. Please call me when Uma Therman or Ethan Hawke somehow get involved.
Oh my God, how long are they going to keep this little comedy going? Can everyone say "PR stunt?!" The studio which produces Twilight and Pattinson's and Stewart's PR firms saw the gigantic photo-op and tabloid cover circus that was the Holmes/Cruise "surprise divorce" and thought, "HEY. Let's git us some of THAT."
This thing is beyond contrived and obvious. And the Twitards are just eating it up! Amazing.
I'll read Michael K's accounts of this story but I will NOT watch parodies. Oh, and Nutty Madame. Just Michael K and Nutty Madame.
Submitted by Amby on Sat, 08/04/2012 - 10:38pm.
I wouldn't have thought this was staged until I remembered reading this
___________
She sounds dim and profane--which is how people speak when they have nothing to say.
I think the married director goes along with this charade because he has a failing or open marriage and a movie to promote.
Kstew really just needs to suck it up...SNAP OUT OF IT!!
Let's all form a line...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLxQQW-rtDY
Cue the repentant & sad stroll, call this bitch a wahmbulance. No rehabbing the image, you're just a skanky skunk.
************************************
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.Kravitz on August 19, 2008
"We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard
♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
This mess is starting to sound like a Nicholas Sparks movie/novel. ..."She can't eat, can't sleep. can't shower, just spends her days pining away for her lost love.." Oh, please! Wake me up when one of them dies of an incurable disease,
_________________
"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
boneritis hahahahahha
|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|.....|
"Let them measure my anus and see if it is dilated."
- Andrés García Torres, inventor of the Catholic Anus Ruler
I know, soulks, don't know who she;s kidding.
She isn't kidding some of us (me) drunk fkers on this Saturday late night with her crybaby shit over her gettinbusted in a car with a married man. Period.
____
“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He's two. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.” -George Carlin (RIP MCA and C.Hitchens) *caprica six was/is here*
not showering/washing??; it's for another film.imo =O
`````````^..+`````````
"And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long"- Redneck Woman
Oh for FFS, your stank unchanged ass can fk off, Kristen, boo the fk hoo!! Goddamnit stfu
____
“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He's two. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.” -George Carlin (RIP MCA and C.Hitchens) *caprica six was/is here*
I wouldn't have thought this was staged until I remembered reading this: http://theberry.com/2012/05/14/kristen-stewart-i-feel-boring-i-feel-like...
If this is all a publicity stunt, it's really fucking sick. Isn't the sleazebag director guy married with some offspring? I wonder how the kids feel when they're at soccer practice and everyone's whispering about their daddy humpin' on Bella. I don't know which is worse, actually screwing around on your wife, or publicly humiliating your family for $$$. Either way, he's a douche. So is she.
.................................................
“I always listen to 'NSYNC's Tearin' Up My Heart. It reminds me to wear a bra.” - BritBrit
Submitted by ditquoi on Sat, 08/04/2012 - 9:12pm.
I wonder if that dumb bitch who tattooed KBlew, RPutz and Taylor whatever on her body crossed out KBlew in anger. LOL
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
LOL! She has one of her imaginary friends take a Sharpie and draw a mustache on it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Ugh. This "depression" is self-perpetuated, she chose to cheat and it's not like she couldn't have known what it might or might not result in.
You wanna talk depression, I'm ready to jump off a freaking bridge or something.